October Is Anti Bullying Month
“You look silly – just kidding”
“You cannot join our group. We don’t like you”
Simple statements.. but did you know these are signs of bullying? No matter what situation or form it takes, bullying has one common factor – it makes the victim feel depressed, hurt, and alone. It keeps them from enjoying the activities and places that are part of their life.
Bullying happens everywhere, all the time, and it's happened forever. Because it's so common, adults sometimes think bullying is just a normal part of growing up. But why should something that can make a person so miserable be part of growing up? The answer is, it doesn't! Each and every one of us has the right to feel safe in our lives and feel good about ourselves.
October is designated National Anti-Bullying Month in the US, to bring attention to bullying across the country and explore solutions to the problem. In all, 47 states in the US have passed some legislation or another, to address bullying in schools. Even Sesame Street has created a show to empower children as young as three to recognize and combat bullying.
What exactly is bullying?
Bullying usually happens when there is an imbalance of power – the bully is either bigger in size, has superior knowledge or better in some activity, and desires to hurt the other person. Bullying need not always be physical such as hitting, pushing around, stealing, or forcing people to do what they do not wish to. It could be verbal - teasing, insulting, refusing to talk to someone, spreading lies or rumors, or excluding someone from a group.
How do you spot a bully?
Bullies come in all genders, shapes, sizes, looks and colors. But one thing that is common is that something or someone is making the bully feel insecure and the act of bullying helps them feel better. The bully may be having a problem in his / her life elsewhere - not getting enough attention, has been bullied before or maybe exposed to a lot to violence in movies and TV. It is important that bullies get help at a young age, or they could turn into even meaner grownups.
And then there are some who are appear nice to you when alone and mean when with others. These people are probably victims of peer pressure.
The good news is we can and should standup whether we are being bullied or watching bullying happen. If it is unsafe to stop a bully during the act, reach out for help and report the situation appropriately as soon as possible. Watching bullying happen is as bad and encourages the bully.
Stopbullying.gov, an initiative from the U.S government, suggests the following strategies to handle bullying.
- Try to surprise the bully by speaking up, using humor or walking away. If a strategy does not work, don’t keep reusing it
- Be assertive, not aggressive
- Ignoring a bully is a common mistake made and may backfire as the bully will work harder to push your buttons
- If you are friends with or know a bully well enough, help them understand their behavior and how they would feel if they were the in the victim’s shoes. A trusted adult could be a valuable guide to you and the bully
Here are more tips suggested by experts.
While it is true that nobody is perfect in this world, it is also true that each of us have our own individual strengths. We have the right and privilege to define our lives for ourselves and not have to accept other’s definition of ours. In the real world, might does not win – successful teams and companies are formed by people cooperating and working together.
Below is the first of eleven excellent videos. Check out stopbullying.gov for the remaining webisodes on bullying.
Do you have any questions or comments on bullying? Can you think of other ways that we can combat bullying in our schools and playgrounds?
Notes
Did you know?
- Bullying is a learned behavior.
- Nine out of ten elementary students have been bullied by their peers?
- More than half of all kids in grades four through eight – 58% have not told their parents or an adult of hurtful/mean things said or done to them.
- The majority of 8 to 11 yr olds (74%) said teasing and bullying occurs at their schools.
Here are some excellent reading resources:
Books by Author Trudy Ludwig:
- Confessions of a former bully
- My Secret Bully
- Sorry!
- Just Kidding
- Trouble Talk
BULLYING IS BAD BAD BAD!!!!!!
please stop bullying
There is this Guy in my class who calls me "little girl" Because i am short for my age.
why does it say that October is an anti bullying month shoudn't every month and say be and anti bullying day/month
I was that i could stick up for those kids but i'm homeschool'd so i havn't seen any yet.I've only met a few who where either picking on me or my brothers and sister and let's just say they won't be coming around anymore or causing any trouble.
I agree with Mrs. Kelly at the top.Kids need to find help for their problems they have or figure it out some how and stop taking it out on kids who just want to be loved and have friends who care about them and don't have to act cool or be some one their not.
It needs to be taught in school, in the classroom, there should be a short curriculum on this in the classroom including role playing, quizzes, and a test..make it part of social studies? It affects a kid's self esteem and extreme cases has caused young kids to take their own lives and yet still nothing has been done. so sick of this problem and sick of it happening to my daughter. Luckily she has dance classes that is a perfect outlet for her that makes her feel good about herself because she is so good and makes her so happy!
i h8 bullying
The bully has to stop! It's so not cool...a lot of people might know they're doing it but some just think they're being nice when really it's upsets others around them!
you have the right idea
Stop the bullying!
that's mean
STOP BULLYING IT IS HORRIBLE
I hate when people bully.
i hate bullies
Bullying is so wrong! i think it should end!
Anybody who lives in New Jersey, you'll understand what I'm talking about. Chris Christie (our governer) just made a bunch of whole new laws about bullying. If anybody bullies anybody else, they go straight to court. Our district is making a big deal about it and making sure that kids understand. Bullying is wrong. There are a bunch of posters in my school about bullying.
bullying has to stop most kids all ready get abused at home they dont need more from kids
Dear Youngziners : We are thrilled to have two experts on bullying answer questions, comments and suggestions from you. This will be an excellent opportunity. Please add any questions you have in the comment box below
good idea
bullying is wrong. i don't remember being bullied, and since i stopped going to my other school, everyone is super nice and friendly to me when i pick up a friend or go to hangout. even people that i never knew though me as their friend. when bullying happened though, i sometimes stood up but i was really shy. now, i am bolder and i now stand up for myself and others, like my younger cousin, but i cant really call her bullying me.........
bullying can not be tolerated. STOP BULLYING!!!! its not fair to others.
bullying has to stop. i used to get bullied a lot by this girl - she used to tell me what to do - she pushed me into the pool in 6 feet and i couldnt swim. i didnt even have goggles and i almost drowned and she did it more than once. i still get bullied. more stories. i'm not gonna say anything more
No one should never pick on any one else
Bullies are just kids who don't have a great family at home and get beat.
bullying should stop because a lot of kids are getting hurt because thats harm to them.
I believe that the people out there who are bullys,should stop it. I mean really , would they even like it if they got bullied? if they would not like that, then why are they even doing that?
The articles right grown ups don't really care about bullyibg sometimes they just ignore you.
Bullying seems to be an extremely huge problem in schools many kids get into trouble when they are bullying others. I am really happy that there is an anti bullying law that has been passed in NJ.
This is a good lesson about bullying
Bullying is a really bad thing. I'm glad that they made this new anti-bullying law. Our class had an assembly on bullying today.
Bullying is never ok and im sorry to this girl kalli that i bullied before and all the bully is, is jealous of that person who is the victim of bullying. I am sorry but i just wish bullying can be gone from the world forever and if u get suspended it doesnt help it makes the bully more aggresive and want to push the victims buttons even more cause they snitched on them
I think that bullying is a bad thing to do and should be stopped because it is the bad thing to do.
BULLYING IS NEVER OK
Well, sometimes bullying could also have a good effect on a child. There was this boy who used to be really mean to me. He could solve a rubik's cube really fast, and he used to tease me a lot. But I was just quiet, and I went home, surfed the net for solutions to a rubik's cube, took my father's help sometimes, and practiced it for a week. Finally, I could solve it faster than he did.
I would never have learnt how to solve it, if it hadn't been for his bullying.
what ever the teachers do bullies don't stop
bad attitude
I've been bullied before and i know some good strategies for survival. 1: Try and talk to the bully and try to make them see sense [its easier to do this if the person has experienced violence at home or elsewhere.] 2: Walk away and dont retaliate because thats what bullies want you to do. 3: If it gets seriously out of hand, go to the principal/person in charge and report it.
how intereasting i thought that that is great that they have an anti bullying day i think that they should keep that up even if means to still have it on seasme street
I feel bad for that boy
I just got bullied at school. This is totally wrong. I wish it never started.
Bullying is so wrong everyone needs to learn that because when you are bullying it gets you nowhere in life. I love to see people concurring on bullying.
i think this is a good way of showing people not to bully other children because some kids just kill everybody and some of them just kill themselves. thats why we are not supposed to bully each other
Bullying is really bad I am sad for people who are bullied it is so mean to bully someone if he is a nice person to people.
At my school we have an Anti Bullying Commitee. I think it really helps. Also, my school is really small and we are kind of like a family. We all care about each other and take care of each other.
bullying must be stopped. im really glad im homeschooled
lucky!
it should stop
Seriously! My school uses force which just makes it worse. It's so annoying! My friend has a new friend now and they are totally excluding me! I wish they could stop because my old friend was technically my only friend.
Bullying should be stopped! It is a very serious issue and it must be put to a stop. I think it's great of the US to have October as anti-bullying month. I think it would do Australia good to have an Anti-Bullying month as well, or even just a day. Though I doubt Bullies really stop just for a day or month. Cyber Bullying is also a very serious matter. That should also be stopped, but there is more than just Cyber Bullying and the Bullying that is mentioned in the ariticle!
"October Is Anti Bullying Month" is a great article and I agree with them, Bullying Needs To Be Stopped. I think Julia Gillard needs to make a Bullying Month/Week/Day, then hopefully a lot of Bullies may stop Bullying... Though I honestly doubt it...
emilys - It is good to hear your perspective from Australia. Bullying is indeed a global issue. You are right that bullies will not stop for a month or day; however having a dedicated month brings attention to the issue at schools, and among children.
Cyber-bullying is a very important issue that you bring up. We had talked about internet safety in an article on hacking (here) as well as in a video (here), and it is something children need to be careful about.
I wish there was a team of kids at school that could beat the bullys, and stop people from you know getting bullied and stuff. THIS HAS TO STOP! Those bullies out there YOUR A BAD PERSON!!